Final Open Letter

HERE

Reflection on Open Letter Draft

In this blog post I will be reflecting on the peer feedback that I received on my Open letter draft.

Oregon's Mt. Hood Territory. "Mount Hood reflected in Mirror Lake, Oregon" Public Domain Dedication.

I peer reviewed Jayni and Nick's draft.

From what I have learned based off of what other students have expressed, we all seem to be in the same boat. Most of us were somewhat taken aback by this english class because it was so much different from the english classes that we were used to taking even though everyone had a different experience with english in the past. The heavy workload and writing in many different genres was new for me and I'm not alone. Along with me, I would say that the majority of people are procrastinators like myself, although there are differing severities. This course has helped me fight against the urge to procrastinate due to the structure of the coursework and from what I have heard others have benefitted as well.


1. Did you demonstrate an ability to think about your writing and yourself as a writer? 

Yes. In my Open Letter Draft I provided a backbone of ideas to elaborate on. In my draft I talked about several things that I think of my own writing style but in my final I will try to become more specific about the things that I have done this year in term of myself as a writer.
2. Did you provide analysis of your experiences, writing assignments, or concepts you have learned?

I think that I did provide analysis of my own experiences in the class. I provided examples of certain assignment that were assigned throughout the year and I talked about how I approached them at the beginning of the year vs how I changed and improved by the end of the year.
3. Did you provide concrete examples from your own writing (either quotes from your writing or rich descriptions of your writing process)? 

I did provide examples of my own writing to support the claims that I made throughout the letter. I did not quote myself or give very specific examples however and this is where I can improve my letter.
4. Did you explain why you made certain choices and whether those choices were effective?

I did explain why some of the choices that I made were made. The main reason being that in the past I wasn't successful in certain aspects of writing so I made a choice to try to change that.
5. Did you use specific terms and concepts relating to writing and the writing process? 

I did use at least one specific term that relates to writing and that was genre. I specifically talked about how we observed genre this year and how what I have learned from doing so will help me in my future endeavors.

Draft of Open Letter

In this blog post I will be providing you with a link to my draft of an open letter.

Reneman. "DRAFT ICON" 2/24/2013. Creative Commons.

HERE is a link to my draft.

I want you to pay attention to the organization of my letter and tell me if it flows well. A lot of times my writing can come off as choppy. Should I move this sentence somewhere else? Should I move a whole paragraph to a different part of the paper? Im worried that the letter might be too formal or not formal enough so look out for that. Obviously look out for grammatical errors but also let me know if the conventions of a letter are met. Thanks.

Reflecting More on My Writing Experiences

In this blog post I will be reflecting further on my writing experiences during this class by answering some questions.

Kjunstorm. "Flower reflection" 4/7/2010. Creative Commons.

1. What were the biggest challenges you faced this semester, overall?
The biggest challenge this year was keeping up with the course work. I felt that there was a lot to be done each and every week. This was hard for me because I am a procrastinator by nature which made everything very difficult to finish on time with high quality.

2. What did you learn this semester about your own time managment, writing and editorial skills?
I learned that time management is a very useful skill to have. I always thought that I have been good at time management until I came to college. In the weeks of this school year that I was on top of all my work I produced some of the best work. After realizing my writing and editorial skills became much better.

3. What do you know about the concept of 'genre'? Explain how understanding this concept is central to being a more effective writer.
genre is very important in writing. I never really had much concept of genre coming into this class because most of the writing I had done was directed at one person, my teacher. Now that I have studied genre I know that it is one of the most important concepts when writing.

4. What skills from this course might you use and/or develop further in the next few years of college coursework?
My time management skills will definitely develop in the near future. After taking this class where everything was basically a timeline, I realized that time management is key when doing work. I hope to develop this skill further because I saw a hint of success when I used it correctly in this class.

5. What was your most effective moment from this semester in 109H? 
The most effective moment in this class was when I was ahead of the game on my blog posts and I finished project 2 draft ahead of time. This gave me so much time to revise the essay that I had wrote as well as gave me optimal time to have other people review and comment on my work through peer review.

6. What was your least effective moment from this semester in 109H? 
The hardest part of this class was falling behind. Several times throughout the semester I fell behind and it was seemingly impossible to catch back up. It was these moments when I realized that I was putting out some of my worst work.

Revisiting My Writing Process.

In this Blog post I will be revisiting my first two blog posts and reflecting on what I wrote in them.

Ferreira, Rosana. "Revisit (12854291315)" 2/2/2014. Creative Commons.

In my post "My Writing Process" I talked a lot about being a heavy procrastinator because I often found that I would spend too long thinking about what I was going to write rather than just starting to write. Because of the way that I used to write, I would often not have enough time to revise my work, a crucial step in the writing process. I talked about how I would usually get the paper done by the deadline despite procrastinating but that the work wouldn't be the best quality possible. This is something that I have worked on a lot throughout the semester and I think that I have set myself on a good track. The way that Mr. Bottai has the class organized forced me to complete a draft before I would have on my own. This has really helped me because it has given me ample time to revise my work which I talked about being one of the worst parts about my writing. I feel that after taking this class it has shown me a better way to be successful and in the near future I will adopt many of the techniques used in this class. The main technique being smarter with my time management by doing things in chunks and not leaving everything for the last moment. In the next couple of years I see myself as being a much better writer mainly because of the organizational techniques I used in this class.

Reflection on Project 3

In this blog post I will be reflecting on my Project 3 essay.

Piolle, Guillaume. "Loch Alsh - Reflection" 8/7/2009. Creative Commons.

1. What was specifically revised from one draft to the next?

I mainly revised the grammatical errors that were in my draft. I also revised the draft so that they essay would flow better. I also tried to change the organization.

2. Point to global changes: how did you reconsider your thesis or organization? 

I tried to reorganize my whole essay so that it flows better with what I am trying to say. I tried to start with medical school and go through all the problems you could have up to becoming a doctor.

3. What led you to these changes? A reconsideration of audience? A shift in purpose? 

I think that flow of the essay was the reason that I changed. The purpose or audience didn't really shift but I wanted the essay to flow better.

4. How do these changes affect your credibility as an author? 

This effects my credibility because it makes my whole essay more sound and that makes my arguments appear stronger which adds to my credibility.

5. How will these changes better address the audience or the venue? 

I always kept the audience in mind when writing this and when I did my revisions, I did it so that it would appeal more to the audience and sound like a better argument. 

6. Point to local changes: how did you reconsider sentence structure and style?

I reconsidered the sentence structure and style so that the essay would have more flow. Once I created more flow the essay arguments sounded stronger.

7. How will these changes assist your audience in understanding your purpose?

These will help the audience because it makes my argument stronger.

8. Did you have to reconsider the conventions of the particular genre in which you are writing? 

I didn't have to rethink the conventions because when I wrote the draft I made sure that I kept the conventions in mind at all time.

9. Finally, how does the process of reflection help you reconsider your identity as a writer? 

I think this reflection process helps me realize where I am as a writer because it helps me realize what exactly I am doing during my whole writing process.

Publishing Public Argument

In this blog post I will be publishing my Public Argument. A link can be found HERE.

llyushka88. "Done" 12/4/2009. Creative Commons.

1. Mark with an "x" where you feel your target audience currently stands on the issue (before reading/watcing/hearing your argument) below:

←----------------------X------------------------------|--------------------------------------------------------->

Strongly                                            Totally neutral                                                    Strongly 

agree                                                                                                                          disagree

2. Now mark with an "x" where you feel your target audience should be (after they've read/watched/heard your argument) below:

←----------------------------------------------------|----------------X----------------------------------------->

Strongly                                            Totally neutral                                                    Strongly

agree                                                                                                                          disagree

3. Check one (and only one) of the argument types below for your public argument:

         _______ My public argument etablishes an original pro position on an issue of debate.

         _______ My public argument establishes an original con position on an issue of debate.

         _______ My public argument clarifies the causes for a problem that is being debated.

         ___X___ My public argument prooposes a solution for a problem that is being debated.

         _______ My public argument positively evaluate a specific solution or policy under debate (and clearly identifies the idea I'm supporting).

         _______ My public argument openly refutes a specific solution or policy under debate (and clearly identifies the idea I'm refuting).

4. Briefly explain how your public argument doesn’t simply restate information from other sources, but provides original context and insight into the situation:

My public argument doesn't simply restate information because I decided to use the proposal argument. At the end I propose a solution to the problem at hand which is my own personal material and opinion. This is how I added original context and insight to the situation.

5. Identify the specific rhetorical appeals you believe you've employedi n your public argument below:

Ethical or credibility-establishing appeals

                    __X__ Telling personal stories that establish a credible point-of-view

                    __X__ Referring to credible sources (established journalism, credentialed experts, etc.)

                    __X__ Employing carefully chosen key words or phrases that demonstrate you are credible (proper terminology, strong but clear vocabulary, etc.)

                    __X__ Adopting a tone that is inviting and trustworthy rather than distancing or alienating

                    _____ Arranging visual elements properly (not employing watermarked images, cropping images carefully, avoiding sloppy presentation)

                    _____ Establishing your own public image in an inviting way (using an appropriate images of yourself, if you appear on camera dressing in a warm or friendly or professional manner, appearing against a background that’s welcoming or credibility-establishing)

                    _____ Sharing any personal expertise you may possess about the subject (your identity as a student in your discipline affords you some authority here)

                    __X__ Openly acknowledging counterarguments and refuting them intelligently

                    __X__ Appealing openly to the values and beliefs shared by the audience (remember that the website/platform/YouTube channel your argument is designed for helps determine the kind of audience who will encounter your piece)

                    _____ Other: 

Emotional appeals

                    __X__ Telling personal stories that create an appropriate emotional impact for the debate

                    _____ Telling emotionally compelling narratives drawn from history and/or the current culture 

                    __X__ Employing the repetition of key words or phrases that create an appropriate emotional impact 

                    _____ Employing an appropriate level of formality for the subject matter (through appearance, formatting, style of language, etc.)

                    _____ Appropriate use of humor for subject matter, platform/website, audience

                    __X__ Use of “shocking” statistics in order to underline a specific point

                    _____ Use of imagery to create an appropriate emotional impact for the debate

                    _____ Employing an attractive color palette that sets an appropriate emotional tone (no clashing or ‘ugly’ colors, no overuse of too many variant colors, etc.)

                    _____ Use of music to create an appropriate emotional impact for the debate

                    _____ Use of sound effects to create an appropriate emotional impact for the debate

                    ____ Employing an engaging and appropriate tone of voice for the debate

                    _____ Other: 

Logical or rational appeals

                    _____ Using historical records from credible sources in order to establish precedents, trends, or patterns

                    __X__ Using statistics from credible sources in order to establish precedents, trends, or patterns

                    _____Using interviews from stakeholders that help affirm your stance or position

                    __X__ Using expert opinions that help affirm your stance or position

                    __X__ Effective organization of elements, images, text, etc. 

                    _____ Clear transitions between different sections of the argument (by using title cards, interstitial music, voiceover, etc.)

                    __X__ Crafted sequencing of images/text/content in order to make linear arguments

                    __X__ Intentional emphasis on specific images/text/content in order to strengthen argument

                    _____ Careful design of size/color relationships between objects to effectively direct the viewer’s attention/gaze (for visual arguments)

                    _____ Other: 

6. Below, provide us with working hyperlinks to THREE good examples of the genre you've chosen to write in. These examples can come from Blog Post 11.3 or they can be new examples. But they should all come from the same specific website/platform and should demonstrate the conventions for your piece:

Example 1

Example 2

Example 3

Reflection on Project 3 Draft

In this post I will be reflecting on my project 3 draft. I peer reviewed Dylan's draft and Mehruba's draft.

EditorE. "Yellow Review logo". 9/1/2013. Creative Commons.

Draft of Public Argument

In this blog post I will explain to my classmates what they might need to know before they look at my draft.

Reneman. "DRAFT ICON" 2/24/13. Creative Commons.

You can find my draft HERE.

I want to know if I meet the conventions of some of the other articles that I hyperlinked in my "Analyzing My Genre" blog post. I also want to know if I present my argument well and if I added to the argument and did not restate things already said.

Considering Visual Elements

In this blog post I will be talking about the visual elements of my paper.

Comestai. "Yoga Space - United Visual Artists - Volume Installation" 12/17/2010. Creative Commons.

Are the fonts appropriate for the visual rhetoric of my paper?

The fonts seem to be appropriate. They tend to be smaller font and times new roman to seem very professional and less elementary. 

Is font large enough to be read at the distance it will be viewed from?

The font is large enough to be seen from the desired distance. It is intended to be seen from a computer screen so the size seems to be appropriate.

Does image emphasize my argument in an important way?

The images that I will use will be used to appeal to the emotions of the readers. This will be important to my argument.

Does graph support my major point?

Yes they support my major argument that not everyone is right for medical school.

Is image in close proximity to my major point it is emphasizing?

Yes. It will be used right next to the point that I am emphasizing so that It is relevant to the my argument.

Is visual rhetorical tone of the project consistent?

The visual rhetorical tone is consistent throughout the project. The font size and use of images is very consistent.

Project 3 Outline

Analyzing My Genre

In this blog post I will be analyzing a genre that I will be publishing my project in.

Proulx, Phillepe. "Pomme et genre d'abeille". 4/23/2007. Creative Commons.

Example 1
Example 2
Example 3
Example 4
Example 5

Social Context

• Where is the Genre set?

Mainly articles on http://www.studentdoctor.net

• Subject of Genre

This site mainly concerns everything to do with helping students become doctors.

• Who uses Genre?

Anyone who thinks that they can help students become doctors

• When and Why is genre used? What purpose does the genre serve for the people who use it?

This genre is used to help any student get into med school.


Rhetorical Patterns of the Genre

• What type of context is usually included and excluded

There is not a lot of context given because they assume that everyone who is reading in this genre is fairly knowledgable of the medical discipline.

• What rhetorical appeals are usually used?

The medical field is highly reliant on logical thinking. The appeal to logos is used a lot in this genre because people in the medical field like to deal with factual evidence.

• How are the texts organized? Any similarities?

The texts on this sight usually consist of short paragraphs. There is not a lot pictures because it seems like appeal to emotion is not popular in the genre.

• Do sentences in this genre have the same style?

The sentences seem to have the same style. Most of the sentences vary in size which is what a good author does.

• What type of word choice is used?

You could probably consider the word choice as serious and very scientific.

Analyze what Patterns reveal about Genre

• Who does genre include and exclude?

This genre includes students that want to find out more information about the medical field. It also includes MD's who offer expert opinion about various things.

• What roles for writers and readers does genre encourage?

This website offers forums where anyone can post on certain subjects and have people reply to them.

• What values and beliefs are assumed about or encouraged from users of this genre?

This genre is for anyone who wants to go into the medical profession and it can be used to help the do so.

• What content does the genre treat as most valuable?

I don't think that there is one thing that this genre treats as most valuable however they are mainly concerned with helping students become doctors.

Considering Types

In this blog post I will be explaining which types of argument I am considering for my public argument.

Steen, Jan. "Steen Argument Over A Card Game". 2/29/2009. Public Domain.

For my project I am considering using an evaluative and proposal type argument. I think that an evaluative type of argument would work with my controversy because it would allow me to evaluate the problem at hand. I could evaluate how doctors are having trouble enjoying their jobs and express the reasons why. However, I think that a proposal type argument would fit my controversy much better. There is already a problem at hand, the fact that doctors are miserable in their workplace. I would address this problem and show that it truly is a problem by adding statistics and expert opinion to support my claim. After I addressed the problem, I would then state ways that an unhappy environment in the medical field could be prevented.


Reflection:
Action Plan: Kelly and Jayni both had very nice action plans. They were both very extensive and addressed all of the points that they needed to. I think that they are similar to my action plan in that sense, however I think that our plans do differ in one major aspect. My controversy doesn't require me to give a lot of background information but both Kelly and Jayni would benefit greatly by providing background information, otherwise their arguments would fail.

Considering Types: Jayni and Kelly both were considering using argument types that are much different that mine. I think that the rout that I wish to go is more or less the road less traveled. The proposal type argument seems to be the least popular amongst the students that I looked at. Jayni and Kelly seem to both be looking in the direction of a position type argument.

My Rhetorical Action Plan

In this blog post I will be discussing my rhetorical action plan.

Bulsuk, Karn. "The PDCA Cycle". 11/20/2008. Creative Commons.

Audience

• For the most part my audience should have some level of interest in my subject because it concerns them directly. They already know the basics of becoming a doctor from the research that they have done and through any experiences that they have had.
• My audience values the doctoral profession because the audience themselves wish to enter that profession.
• I think that statistics showing how many current physicians are unhappy with their work will be very effective in creating a standard for argument. I think that it will be most effective if I just state the facts outright
• I think that if I were to include pictures of doctors during work hours that are overwhelmed, stressed, or unhappy will help appeal to the emotions and help persuade my audience.
• The audience is listening to my argument because I believe that many of them are not informed enough to make a decision to enter the medical field. I want to provide a solution to the problem of unhappy doctors by making them reevaluate what they are trying to get into.

Genre

• The function of my genre is to propose a solution to a common problem.
• I could see my genre being used in any source of media that is highly accessed by younger adults, specifically targeting the ones that wish to enter medical school in the near future. I could see my self expressing my argument over a media site such as Youtube. A link to two Youtube videos in the same genre can be found here and here.
• I will definitely be using logos and pathos in my argument by presenting some data that is a potential game changer. This data will appeal to the emotions because it will shock the readers as well as appeal to logic because it is hard evidence supporting my claim.
• If I decide to use visual elements it will be those of doctors that look to be unhappy in their workplace. I will do this to promote an appeal to emotions in my readers.
• I will definitely be using a scientific and formal approach to this project to appeal to my credibility.

Responses/Actions

• Positive

• People are persuaded away from a career that they wouldn't have enjoyed.

•  People will become aware of the problem at hand.

•  Someone of importance supports my argument and offers validity.

• Negative

• People will refute by saying, "Not all doctors are unhappy. "

•  People will ignore my argument and potentially enter the wrong field.

•  "You're not a doctor why should I listen to you?"

Analyzing Purpose

In this blog post I will be analyzing the purpose of the argument that I wish to make.

Chiltepinster. "Mocking Bird Argument". 6/26/2011. Creative Commons.

1. As a result of my public argument, I don't want to merely scare away medical students from med school but rather make them really understand what they're getting into. I want to show that medical school and actually working as a physician may not be the same thing that many people think it is. I want to show that some people are unhappy in their job and that anyone thinking about getting into this profession should really take a look into it and reconsider.

2.Plausible Actions/reactions

• People will reevaluate their thoughts on a medical profession. - This will better the community because there will be less physicians that hate their job, therefore increasing the quality of doctoral work.
• People will make the right decision about entering medical school. - This will better the community because there will be less physicians that hate their job, therefore increasing the quality of doctoral work.
• People will ignore my argument and proceed anyways. - This will hurt the medical field because there will be people entering a job that they may find they don't like. A consequence of this would be bad doctoral work.
• I broaden peoples awareness on the subject. - This can only help the argument. If I broaden the awareness then people will understand the issue at hand on a broader scale.

Not Plausible

• The whole healthcare system is changed.
• I change millions of minds.

4. People who are the most likely to advance my argument and who are most likely to move towards achieving my goal would be physicians. The most relevant voice would be that of physicians that are unhappy in their job. Physicians that regret going into their profession would want to inform prospective students so that they wouldn't make the same mistakes that the current physicians made a couple years ago.

Analyzing Context

In this blog post I will be analyzing the context of my controversy.

Dugdale, Dave. "Analyzing Financial Data". 10/20/2010. Public Domain.

1. The key schools of thought and perspectives in my public debate are that doctors are not getting treated in a way that they used to and how they believe that they should be treated differently.

2. The major disagreements in my public debate are that doctors should still be meeting the standard of quality of work that they used to but the doctors feel that this is impossible with the amount of work and patients they receive.

3. Some possible common ground would be an agreement that the doctors are being overworked and that they need to be given less work and the patients need to be distributed amongst more doctors.

4. Some idealogical differences are ones that deal with cultural differences. There are not similar problems that occur in other parts of the world that have better healthcare. The American culture and bad healthcare is prompting this problem.

5. There is not much that the audience can do in this situation. The audience are patients of the doctors and cannot do much to change this controversy unless they all unite to demand changes in the healthcare system.

6. The perspectives of the doctors is what is important in supporting my own arguments because i wish to argue that doctors are not happy in their jobs.

7. Perspectives of physicians that really enjoy their line of work will be the greatest threat to my argument because it will provide expert opinion and facts to argue against my argument.


Reflection:
Morgan and Jayni both had context that was somewhat similar to that of mine. Morgan and my arguments are similar in that they are highly opinionated but are still backed up by facts so that its not just one word over the other. Jay's argument differed from mine because of the amount of common ground on each side of the debate that there is. My controversy differed because there is very little common ground.

Audience and Genre

In this blog post I will be identifying two targeted groups of individuals that could be the audience for my third project.

"HK Ocean Park Audience". 4/11/2007. GNU Free Documentation License.

Audience
I think that there are two clear audiences for my writing. The first would be patients. The patients are clearly being effected by the way that doctors are being treated. The doctors have little time to spend with the patients because they are overbooked with work which also effects the patients. The second audience would be any prospective medical students. The article offers insight to what physicians have to do and why they do not like it so it definitely appeals to these students.

Publication Locations

• For Patients

For patients I would choose to publish in place that they would search to find out information about the healthcare system or in a place where they would search to see if they should see a doctor, such as WebMD, HealthFinder, Family Doctor and iHealthSpot.

• For prospective Medical Students

For medical students I would publish in a place where they might be looking frequently. Reddit offers forums that have people discuss the medical field, which would be a great place to target my audience. Other places would be MayoClinic, a website comprised of thousands of physicians that post things related to the medical profession. Finally I could publish in sites that are directly directed at medical students such as Student Doctor Network or Medscape.

Extended Annotated Bibliography

In this post I will be presenting you with a bibliography for 4-6 sources that provide answers to some of my questions that I recently came up with.

Papertrix. "Bibliography". 8/28/2005. Creative Commons.

Here is a link to my Extended Annotated Bibliography.

Narrowing My Focus

In this post I will be exploring some further questions that I have about my article, "Why Doctors Are Sick of Their Profession".

Denelson83. "Circle-question-purple". 12/16/2012. GNU Free Documentation License.

How can this controversy be resolved?
It's hard to tell exactly. This is mainly a question of opinion so everyones opinion would be different, but the main problem associated with this controversy is the fact that the doctors are being overworked. This could be a product of the healthcare system that we have in place in the United States but a simple fix to this controversy would be to lower the amount of work that the doctors are receiving. This would reduce the stress that they are having during work and allow them to give much more attention to their patients and ultimately increase their moral.

Where does this controversy mainly take place?
This controversy takes place within the health care system in the United States. The USA doesn't have the best health care system in the world, in fact its not that great at all. According to The Patient Factor the US ranks 37th overall in best health care systems worldwide. There are many things wrong with our health care. The controversy being expressed in my article is a direct result of the poor system in the US.

Questions About Controversy

In this post I will be coming up with some potential questions that I have about a controversy in my field. I will be using the article from project 2, "Why Doctors Are Sick of Their Profession" as a basis for project 3.

Neutrality. "Question mark (black on white)". 6/13/2005. Public Domain.

Who

• Other than doctors who feels this way about their job?
• Other than patients who is the audience of this controversy?
• Who doesn't feel that same way about their job?
• Who else is expressing their opinions on this controversy?
• Who is not involved in this controversy but should be?

What 

• What should doctors do about their profession?
• What options to physicians have if they are not enjoying their jobs?
• What culture promotes this unhappy environment?
• What exactly is causing the unhappiness in the profession?
• What should unhappy patients do about this?

Where

• Where does this controversy mainly take place?
• Where in the world would this controversy not be a problem?
• Where in the world is this controversy the most problematic?
• Where is this the most problematic, culturally?
• In what culture has this become the most problematic?

When

• When was this controversy first brought up?
• When will it be resolved?
• When will new research be conducted?
• When will being a doctor be a "good" job again?
• When when did doctors first become upset?

How

• How can this controversy be resolved?
• How will new statistics be found?
• How can they enjoy their jobs again?
• How has this been publicized?
• How is the general population reacting to this controversy?

Reflection on Project 2

In this post I will be reflecting on my essay from project 2.

Prabhu B. "Tso kiagar lake Ladakh". 7/19/2007. Creative Commons.

1. I specifically revised the whole introduction and the conclusion. I did so while following the the guidelines for writing conclusions and introductions from the textbook. I also slightly revised the body paragraphs by rearranging them so that the ideas link better. And of course I did my best to fix all grammar and spelling issues.
2. I changed my thesis around because I felt that it didn't address the rubric as well as it could have. I made sure that I added in the words ethos, pathos and logos. I wanted to make sure that my essay would make arguments that addressed the thesis exactly. I did my best to rearrange the essay so that it is more organized and so that the ideas flowed better throughout the entire paper.
3. After reading my peer review and reading the essay prompt I realized that I should probably be more specific and include the words ethos, pathos and logos. 
4. I think that they only add to my credibility because it shows that I have more knowledge of rhetoric if I include names to specific rhetorical strategies.
5. I think that rearranging my essay so that it is more organized and flows better makes it easier for my audience.
6. I tried to make sure that my sentences were structured well and that all of the grammar was correct. I tried to structure my tone so that it made me appear the most credible to my audience.
7. I tried to structure my sentences so that it would appeal mostly to my audience. I think that after I did this it made it easier for my audience to understand my purpose.
8. I definitely had to reconsider the conventions for the genre that I was writing in. The whole time I was writing I tried to make sure that I was writing within the conventions and the project rubric.
9. Reflection helps me as a writer because it brings out the true writer within me. It made me realize some things that I did that I didn't realize I did before I reflected.

Reflection:

Jayni, Nick and I all seemed to do the most revision to the same areas of our essays. All of us revised the introduction and the conclusion the most. Along with Jayni, I feel that these are some of the hardest parts of an essay to write because they provide the first and lasting impressions. I revised these parts so heavily to make sure that they completely address the rubric for this project.

Project 2 Final Draft

Here is a link to my final essay.

Punctuation, Part 2

In this blog post I will be discussing three different punctuation topics and then providing examples of them in my essay.

Whytock, Ken. "Punctuation Saved Grangma's Life". 3/3/2014. Creative Commons.

After reviewing three new punctuation topics I didn't really find anything that was that exciting. I know in general when and when to not use a particular punctuation point. However, I did learn that you should avoid using the dash because if it is overused it can create a choppy effect in your writing.

Here are two punctuation errors from my essay draft.

• "...was a physics student from the University of California Berkeley and is currently a practicing cardiologist..."

I found that in this particular sentence I need to add a comma after the word "Berkeley" to keep with the conjunction rules for writing. I also need to add a dash in-between California and Berkeley.

• "He uses quotes such as, “What happens when doctors are unhappy? They have unhappy patients.” to directly address the problem..."

I noticed that in this excerpt, the quote that I use ends with a period when it should end with a comma or an ellipsis.

Revised Conclusion

In this blog post I will be throwing out my old conclusion and rewriting it completely. I will be using the Rules For Writers textbook as a guide for how to construct a successful conclusion.

Center for Scientific review. "Scientific Review". 8/22/2005. Public Domain.

I feel that my new conclusion is much more effective because it goes beyond simply summarizing the points that I made earlier in my essay. Using the textbook as a guide I developed my conclusion off the question "So what?". I also like the way that I incorporated some evidence to support my claim about why it is important. I also think that the quote I used at the end helps address the larger issues of the article.



My Old Conclusion
Dr. Sandeep Jauhar uses several different rhetorical strategies in his article about the struggles of being a doctor in this day and age. He implements a particular tone in his writing to appeal to a certain audience that he has in mind. He creates the attitude of his piece by carefully choosing his diction. By doing so he creates validity in his claims and manipulates the reader into believing his claims are true. He then implements the use of statistics in his writing to appeal to the readers logic and emotions. His article was ultimately effective in presenting his claim that doctoring is no longer the same job that it used to be. He wants to get to the deeper meaning that people should do something that they truly love. Becoming a physician once provided him that joy but recently has digressed from what he really liked. many people will still pursue the medical profession because of the payout but as it was once said, "Do something you love and you will never work a day in your life".


My Revised Conclusion
Jauhar's article was ultimately effective in presenting his claim that doctoring is no longer the same job that it used to be. Through implementing these rhetorical strategies he is able to provide information that can benefit students and help determine the right direction some students should take later in life. Had he not been effective in implementing rhetorical strategies some students would ignore his arguments and proceed to medical school only to find themselves in a place where they don't want to be. Jauhar and 94% of other physicians are examples of why not everyone is suited for the medical field. He presents these arguments successfully so that the many prospective medical students don't make the same mistake as he did. Yet, many people will chase this job because of the paycheck but Jauhar wants to get at the bigger picture that if you "do something you love you will never work a day in your life."